A Reason
by Avenging Neko
Summary: This is a rather strange one shot sort of… introspection on what Seras Victoria has gone through in her life and unlife. Some could consider it my take on her reason to stay a virgin.


_**A Reason**_

_**Ketti:**_The doc manager ate my original note. I sorta forget what I said. XD Uh... yeah, I'm not sure where this came from. I kinda am, but it went so far different when I started typing it, that I don't. Heh. Happens to me a lot. And... yeah, you read the summary (I assume) one shot. Seriously. Just a one shot.

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Seras Victoria lost her parents when she was only six years old. Perhaps 'lost' is the wrong word, for they were taken from her, right before her very eyes, by two men with guns. Something terrible happened between their death and when the murderers getting away that had Seras waking screaming in the night for months afterwards. The same day she'd woken in the hospital with her abdomen bandaged she was transferred to the psych ward for intensive counseling.

She was better. At least that's what they said.

She'd spent the next ten years in the orphanage, going to public school until she had enough credits to transfer to the police academy. What happened between that day and her final mission in Cheddar needs little notation.

That night was Hell, or as close to it as she would get while still alive; her entire squad murdered and transformed into ghoulish rotting corpses that chased her down in the woods she fled to after their failed ambush in the church. The man in red had frightened her, appearing like a ghost in her adrenaline high, she hadn't really meant to shoot him, but when his arm… He wasn't human, and it wasn't until later that she truly appreciated that fact – appreciated? Really? Well, she was still alive in a sense, and he **had** killed the corrupt priest – whom she had run into shortly after fleeing from the new monster. Eddie… Simon…

She was getting a bit off track, wasn't she?

Surrounded by already decomposing zombie husks of her friends, the vampiric priest had disarmed her after she got a shot off into his skull, and when his hand touched her breast she began to scream inside her head. She couldn't even think of how he'd…

Well, in any case, the 'man in red' appeared when her assailant's fangs pricked her neck, and she had screamed. Needless to say Alucard had won the little 'fight' after allowing himself to be blown to smithereens, literally. Her Master delighted in letting his prey think they had bested him before regenerating in a cloud of blood and shadows, more than likely laughing.

The coward vampire had used her as a meat shield, but, as she had said, she was only alive in a sense. After a mind boggling question regarding her virginity, he had shot her, _through the chest_, to get to the priest behind her. It hadn't taken her long in his company after the fact to know that he damned well could have let her live, but he had still offered her a second chance. She had been drowning in her own blood, lung punctured, and vision blurring as the red liquid spread in a sacrifice to the night, when he appeared, framed by the moon. What did she want to do? Of course she wanted to live!

…Right?

_Mommy… Daddy…_

Tears had further blurred her fading sight, and she had been scared as she reached for him, hoping that he could still save her.

Foolish, hm?

When she woke the next night, the first thing she checked was the lack of hole through her chest, only to look up into the leering red eyes of the man who'd killed her, then brought her back as an unholy creature. It had taken her shell shocked brain a moment to realize she had nearly flashed him her breasts and she squealed in shock, jerking back from him even as he stood and loomed over her like a crimson shadow.

"Police Girl, how does it feel now that you're a vampire?"

Fast forward to the night capping her first week as a fledgling vampire, she had just woken from her bed, and she stood in her new uniform, staring with a mixture of disgust and despair at the medical bag waiting on her table in a bucket of ice. The arms wrapping around her from behind nearly made her scream aloud, though her mind was thrown into shrill chaos as she went stiff as a board against the firm chest pressing to her back. She didn't like to be touched in such a manner by surprise!

Hands trembling at her sides, she tried to take a calming breath, only to choke on it and jerk forwards, straining against the red clad steel bands holding her fast as breath tickled the back of her neck.

"Police Girl…" the knowledge that it was her combined savior and destroyer did little to comfort her and her blue eyes scanned the room instinctively for bolt holes. "You seem tense." She could feel his smirk against her skin, and knew he was mocking her, but his arms loosened and she ducked free to put the table between them, eyeing him warily. "You should drink the blood."

Doubtless their _conversation_ would have continued further had Sir Integra not called the crimson fucker to her side at that moment, sparing the rattled blonde until a later date.

That later date came a few weeks later, the night after their run in with Father Anderson, her Master had pinned her to the wall and dangled the blood pack in front of her face, leering at her, and she'd panicked.

She… didn't want to get into what all entailed after that. Suffice to say rules were set down on both sides and each came out the other side relatively happier.

Slowly the tense barriers began to crumble as she felt more and more at ease around the unnerving creature that was her Sire, and they shared more quiet moments in companionable silence away from prying mortal eyes.

When at all possible she preferred to pretend the Valentine Brothers attack never happened. The ghouls…

_She shivered in her coffin bed, feeling exposed despite the lid being down, and her nails dug deep into her arms, nearly peeling off her own skin. The blood had pooled in her mouth, tasting of ash and soil, and no matter how often she rinsed and gargled, she could still taste it. She felt ill but there was nothing in her stomach to reject._

_Sir Integra's words rang in her head, the memory of those frail arms thrown around her drawing her slightly back from the edge of… something, something she didn't want to explore. "Seras! That's enough, you can stop."_

_Could she? The red haze had torn her control away, bowing to the alien voice in her thoughts that hissed about revenge and glorious blood. _

_She was afr- something was there! _

_Tensing and bracing herself on her knees in a ready crouch, blue eyes bled red and nostrils flared. Something… something…_

_A white gloved sunk down into the open space and she nearly bit it before recognition hit and she watched with morbid curiosity as it came closer and closer and… Flinching, she closed her eyes and ducked her head down._

_The soft petting nearly made her jump out of her skin before she realized what he was doing. Shuddering, she felt the violently clashing emotions drain out of her as her body went limp and she slumped over to the padded mattress. The hand followed, petting her head comfortingly as she dozed off._

Her 'relationship' with Captain Bernadotte was laughable at best, she avoided him like the plague when not forced to train him and his men in the _new_ way to take down targets, and their sexual harassment drove her insane. It wasn't until he risked himself to push her out of the way of a stray bullet that they started to get along, but then it was more like siblings, despite the Frenchman's perverse ways. Going out in Rio with him to check their possible routes home, in the sunlight, felt gloriously normal though she had to keep herself covered to avoid a nasty burn.

The next few days were a blur of chaos and blood, though she would never be able to forget his final moments trying to save her from Zorin… Sighing, she glanced fondly at her shadow arm where she could _almost_ see a single green eye looking at her from the depths. Her lips twitched as she heard the whisper of her familiar's voice in her head; _Get those Nazis, Seras, bring them down to the pits of Hell. _And then, her Master, returning just in the nick of time. Her smile widened as she recalled the look of approval in her Sire's eyes before Angel Dust ruined the moment. It was hard to believe it all happened _so fast_…

And then, he was gone. The sudden loss of connection to him nearly drove her bonkers, but she still had Integra to look after, the battlefield was no time for a breakdown. She had personally pulled up the square of concrete Alucard's blood had stained, setting it on his coffin to keep the two connected.

So, these were all her reasons for what she did. Was it truly any surprise she had stayed a virgin? In thirty long years, she'd considered it a number of times, but felt no real urge to try. _Really, she'd never admit it to herself, but she was scared. Of course she knew the difference between consensual and not, but…_

"Police Girl." Her Master purred as he slid through the wall, it was week two after his return and Sir had been happier (not that she'd ever let the pompous red menace know) with him back than she'd been in years. Seras was, of course, ecstatic, positively giddy with anticipation to get _her_ moment alone with the creature. She'd left a few minutes after bursting in on him terrorizing Sir in her bed, grinning as she snuck off to retrieve her pillow and blanket from his chair where she slept on occasion. He'd found her in her room, more furnished now with photos and a comfortable rug in cheerful colors, and she was waiting for him at the table, red eyes glowing.

"_You've grown." He said in lieu of greeting, sitting down opposite her, legs crossed at the knee as he lounged back and observed her with his burning ginger gaze._

"_It's so great to have you back, Master!" She chirped, just like thirty years ago on the battlefield, and his lips twitched in recognition._

"_Come here," he murmured, crooking his finger and she stood easily, left arm rippling and flickering black as she fairly bounced over to the man. "You need some practice yet," he noted without any bite, so she nodded, taking it as truth, "but I am proud of you, little fledgling."_

_Without another word he yanked her unceremoniously into his lap, and unlike other times, unlike with any other male, she did not tense and instead relaxed into his hold, closing her eyes._

_He hummed his approval as he pressed his lips over the original puncture, "I'm terrible thirsty, Seras."_

_In answer, she craned her head back, further exposing her throat to the danger pf jer Sire's teeth._

"My eternal little wine press," He chuckled, caging her to his chest as he sat them down on her bed, and she shivered. "Ruminating on the past are we?"

"Mmm…" Seras shrugged, and yawned, she was still a bit tired from pulling an all day-er for Sir Integra, though she didn't need to sleep every day, it made her grouchy to skip.

He chuckled, and she shivered at the feel of his breath tickling across her skin, arching her head back invitingly. It felt good to have his teeth in her – because he wanted it to – and she knew he enjoyed her virginal blood as much as she enjoyed her discovery of how to mix blood and chocolate together.

He needed no further invitation, and teeth sunk into the same spot, renewing the bite, and her back arched as she mewled in pleasure. It was great to have him back.


End file.
